I posted a few days ago about the place of the elderly in our faith communities – that they have a place in the church that no one can fill, and that their own journeys are not over.

One part of Jim’s post that I have been thinking about is his comment that traditional churches are doing a better job than emerging communities.  I partly agree with him in regards to mainline denominations, but I otherwise disagree for two reasons.

I say partly because I don’t think that the large number of elderly members in mainline churches is as much a result of them doing senior ministries better, as it is a simple result of minimal changes to church structure and liturgy.  This results in more seniors attending, because it is the style of church, liturgy, and hymns that they are familiar with.

I also don’t think that the emerging communities are doing a bad job.  Actually, I would have to disagree with the premise of that statement.  The emerging conversation brings together people of a similar mindset, and therefore includes people of all ages, races, places, and backgrounds. 

The Gen-X movement sought to bring together people focusing on an age range, and quickly found that the issue was not one of age, but of a way of thinking & living.  Out of that evolved our current conversation, and while it may appeal to a predominantly younger crowd I feel that this simply points to the rising percentage of postmodern thinkers with each generation.

In between the churches of the emerging conversation and the mainline denominations are the evangelical churches, and this is where I have seen the greatest lack of attention given to seniors.  From several personal experiences, I feel that many churches only tolerate their older members.  The church gives the older members their own Sunday school class and social club, and then convinces itself that they are doing a good job of ministering to the elderly members of the church. 

The occasional requests for a hymn or relevant class topic are ignored, because the church is too busy trying to get the seekers with the rock n’ roll worship services and hot-topic studies, and polished performances.  This is a really sad situation that our churches find themselves in.  The seniors have been influenced by their generation and difficult times to not complain when something is wrong, but instead grin and bear it.

The really sad fact is that often times the people getting the least amount of attention are the ones who kept the church alive in the time of transition from lesser relevance to the seeker sensitive, polished show of a church.  In those hard times when numbers were low, and people continued to leave for greener pastures these people remained dedicated to their church home.  Now they are repaid with a church they hardly recognize anymore, and a hint of irritation from the people around them.

Of course, this isn’t every church, but I feel that there are many who fit this bill and fail to realize it.  We should all take a serious look at how we regard the elderly in our faith communities, and make sure that their faith journeys are being as celebrated as anyone else’s.  Intergenerational gatherings and fellowship should also be a priority for us.  We have already missed so much guidance and empathy by leaving them out of the loop this long.

Just some of my thoughts.  I would love to hear yours.  How do you think churches are doing with giving attention and respect to their older members?  What else would you suggest as possibilities for improvement?

There is a great quote over at an association of associations* blog, Acronym, that is from Ben Martin over at Certified Association Executive.

“And the conversation isn’t all about your blog: If you write a blog but don’t read others’ blogs, comment on them and link out to them, what you have is antisocial media. My mom taught me that God gave us two ears and one mouth so that we could listen twice as much as we speak. Unfortunately, many seem to believe that God gave them ten fingers and two eyes so that they can type five times as much as they read.“

This touches back to my A Conversation for Everyone post, and the fact that we need to be seeking an ongoing dialogue instead of one-way rhetoric.  If there is no conversation there is no change, and if there is no change then there is no point to our conversation.** I am currently attempting to stay on top of 83 blogs in my Google Reader. It isn’t always easy, and I don’t get to thoroughly read every post that I want to (many are starred for return), but it keeps me involved in the many conversations that are happening under the umbrella of the emerging/ missional conversation.

This is true for Christ-followers, Association Execs, and anyone else who dares to put their ideas, thoughts, and struggles in the blogosphere for all to see!

Peace.

* This may seem redundant, but it is not.  It truly is an association of associations; and it gets really confusing when you begin to talk about their gatherings and how they associate their associations with the association of association, as well as the synergy of one association with another association within the association of associations (gotta love In Good Company).   

** While Yoda-esque in its wording, this is not as circular in definition as it may appear.  It is merely a sign of the abundance of caffeine in my system, as are these footnotes that didn’t really need to be here.

(HT: my lovely wife, Dana) 

Jim over at Lord, I Believe; Help My Unbelief! has a great post from Saturday that forces us to look at a part of ministry where we often fall short: the elderly.

I may be in the minority, but for me the aging community is very much an awareness in ministry.  I am blessed to have a wife who has opened my eyes to the wonderful ministry that only the elderly can give us, and also to the lack of inclusion and attention in our churches.  Just as I have devoted my life to ministry, and in doing so have entered into this emerging conversation to seek a better way; so also has my wife is giving her life, but she is seeking a better way in aging — so that those who are living out their lives somewhere other than home can feel like they are at home instead of an institution or a hospital.

We are very aware of the lack of attention given to the elderly in the world around us.  Seeking a better way to help older people find a home in our faith communities – where they are still a part of the journey instead of a burden, should be important to us if it isn’t already.

So quickly we forget that the elderly in our communities are those who have gone before us.  When someone is struggling with an idea, a question, or a situation, there is more than likely an elderly person in the community with a wealth of wisdom and discernment if not direct, personal experience that could help someone else through the same struggle.

It is also important to remember that the places they have been are only part of a journey that they are still on.  People assume that the elderly have “got it,” and are just waiting to go; but the fact is that older Christians are struggling with faith questions just as we are.  While we are wrestling with questions about how we are to live, and what God wants us to be doing as part of His work, older believers are asking their own questions.

“Have I accomplished enough in my life?”

“Have I lived a life that is pleasing to God?” 

“Do I still have anything left?  Does God still want to use me?  Can God still use me?”

These questions are just as important to the community as anyone else’s; and we would greatly benefit from remembering that the elderly living their faith alongside us not only have questions of their own, but also have a great deal to offer us as we struggle at certain points along the path that they have already traveled.